You Take Your Life in Your Hands

PIXIE:
I am a pixie with a wife and family, for them I did my work
I designed bark patterns all day long, my best, I did not shirk
Now I must face my daily nightmare to get back to my burrow room
I've got to buck killer traffic to get my bug across the meadow of doom

You've got your vehicular contortionists driving junebugs on their sides
And a bunch of young punks on dragonflies eating other people's rides
Wow! Some frost child talking on a click beetle plowed right into a stone!
When will they learn you've got to pull to a stop when you use a multicellular phone?

Some moron's backed his bumblebee into a lily, where'd he learn his driving skills?
He's caused a thousand-butterfly pileup over the field of daffodils
Now there are wings and stings and fluttering things a mile square and ten feet tall
This whole valley's one vast blur of motion, but no one's really moving at all...

Oh boo hoo! Life is not fair!
I'll never get to see my pixettes grow up 'cause I spend all my time in the air!
When I finally get home, they'll be 300 years old -- they'll say, "Who's that geezer at the door?"
And Sweetums will say, "Hush, that's someone who used to live here, he doesn't live here any more."

There's that swath of clear airspace by the verge of the woods, for emergency animals alone
Emergency animals can kiss my pixie toes! I'm pulling out, I'm on my way home!
Ha ha! Watch those bird fairies flip their birds at me! I don't care, I'm on a roll!
But what are those red and blue flashing eyes? Oh no! A police troll!

TROLL:
Hey buddy, your lightning bug's taillight's out, I'd get that fixed if I were you
And I see by the pollen sticker over here that your inspection is about to come due
Now they'd probably yank your license if I wrote you up for being in this lane
But hey, we're all inhuman...
and I just found a stale doughnut...
don't ever ever ever ever...ummm...do that again...
drive safe, and have a nice day.

Back to the OVFF Songwriting Award Winners Page