The Pegasus Awards

Andrew Ross IF


Pegasus Nominations

Year Category Song
2017 Best Writer/Composer  
2013 Best Writer/Composer  
2011 Most Badass Song Crispy Danish

Andrew Ross 
(also known as "Miles Vorkosigan" on Facebook, "Admiral Wordsmith" in general fandom, and "Juniper Coeur de Lapin" in the SCA) is a person of several identities who was dragged to a filksing in 1997 by an over-enthusiastic friend, and found the first members of his adopted family in fandom. Today, his songs tend to focus on various media plots, political rants, and true stories from legal situations too crazy to make up.  He occasionally performs with a geek band called Possible Side Effects.

In the mundane world, Andrew is an attorney and proud father of three in Eugene, Oregon.  Outside the Pacific Northwest, his songs are most accessible via back issues of Xenofilkia and under the "Song-O-Matic" (52 songs in 52 weeks) caption on Facebook filk pages.

Representative Work for the 2017 Pegasus Awards.

The Singular They

Lyrics Copyright © by Andrew Ross, All rights reserved
Used by permission
(May be sung to: Schoolhouse Rock, "Rufus Xavier Sarasparilla")

Now, I have a friend named Firefly Westeros Androgyna
And I could say that HE OR SHE's nonbinary,
And HE OR SHE prefers
That you would address HIM OR HER
As Firefly Westeros Androgyna.
I could say that--but I don't have to.
With singular they, I can say:
THEY are nonbinary and want you to use the singular "THEY"

You see, HE and SHE are gendered pronouns not needed
By one Firefly Westeros Androgyna, a very proper one.
So THEY is a pronoun replacing the ones HE and SHE

(No drama!)

Now Firefly has a partner named Pikachu Universe Androgyna
Since both are nonbinary, I could say to you:
THEY married Firefly who loves THEM so much
And now THEY are one---but I don't say that!
'Cause IT has a different gender-neutral preference
That makes IT happy.

And my name is Moonrocket Fairchild Sagittarius
(Obviously born in the Sixties)
Another gender-neutral way is:
I see ZIE just took ZIR car to be repaired
And now ZIE's happy.

You see, the singular THEY can take the place of them all
'Cause being stuck with binary pronouns
Can drive you up the wall!

Now, I could tell you Pikachu Universe Androgyna
Or Firefly Westeros Androgyna
Or Moonrocket Fairchild Sagittarius
Has 5-Alpha Reductase Reficiency
Or XXY, or XYY
Or 17-Beta-Hydroxysteroid Dehydrogenase III Deficiency
Which is part of being Firefly Westeros Androgyna
Or Pikachu Universe Androgyna
Or Moonrocket Fairchild Sagittarius

But break it down, and I can say in this way:
THEY're a person just like YOU
So treat THEM as such
Because the singular THEM can replace HER or HIM
'Cause being stuck with binary pronouns can wear your patience thin.

Sometimes when THEY go out with US
People really make a fuss!
They start shouting obnoxious pronouns at us like
"WHO is the man in your relationship?", and
"WHAT gender are you?", and
"WHICH bathroom should that one be allowed to use?"

WHO, WHAT and WHICH are not your business
Just don't ask those questions
It won't matter if you do not know the gender of someone
But I know!
THEY or IT for HE and HER
or ONE or THON or ZIE or ZIR
THEY like ME and I respect THEIR preference
That's how it is with friends.

And THEY is really MY friend.....
'Cause being stuck with binary pronouns
Can drive you round the bend!



[OVFF]     Contact