Someone on the Internet is wrong

Words © by Marilisa Valtazanou
Music © by Mich Sampson
(with a wink to XKCD)
All rights reserved
Used by permission

It's midnight on a Tuesday in December,
And I'm sitting on the sofa (as you do)
When I notice someone moving out the corner of my eye
And I look up from the screen to find out who.

It's my husband, wearing nothing but a towel
And an attitude of passion and of thirst
I say "sorry love - hang on - I'll be with you in a minute
But there's something that I have to get done first -

(because...)

CHORUS:
Someone on the Internet is wrong,
And the urge to set the world to rights is really rather strong.
There's a gravitational force
That pulls me off my course
When someone on the internet is wrong.

It's a Friday with my mates down at the local
I've excused myself and popped out to the loo
I am sitting there quite comfy with my trousers round my knees,
And I've taken out my iPhone, as you do (you know you do...)

Then the cubicle door rattles rather loudly
And a stranger's voice says "you all right in there, love?"
I mumble "yeah" and realise I've been there half an hour
But I've got unfinished business to take care of...

(you see)

CHORUS

In every other aspect of my life I'm quite contained
I'm amenable to reason, my reactions are restrained;
I have civilised discussions, keep my tantrums short and sweet
And I never once have shouted at a stranger in the street.

But an online, unknown fool
Is a red rag to a bull
And I can't resist the pull
Of just one more snarky tweet...

Now I'm standing on the stage before an audience
And you'd think that that would occupy my cortex
But the siren call of Facebook isn't easy to resist
And I find myself being sucked into the vortex...

...
... (you do know we're the band?)
....
It's ok, I'm sure these people understand

(that)
CHORUS X 2